13 January 2019


I was eavesdropping a conversation inside the coffeeshop from two beautiful girls as they were sitting behind me while I was enjoying my cup of iced mocha. The other girl was complaining about the number of likes she got on her Instagram post. If I remember right, she said, “I don’t understand why am I only getting less than a hundred likes when I know that my picture was really good.” - or something like that.

It would be hypocritical for me to say that the numbers never bothered me at all. There is a sense of high when we receive likes from our social media accounts. That is why we keep posting and going back at it. However, while it feels good in the moment, what if it becomes more important than the way we look at ourselves? I have deleted posts when they don’t get as much likes as I expect them to receive. It did not even matter whether I loved those photos. If the number of likes was below 50, it was enough reason for me to delete the post. There was also a time when I posted an OOTD that I was really proud of and felt amazing wearing it, but clearly Instagram felt otherwise. So, I deleted the photo instead. Sounds crazy, right? But I did it anyway. 



Looking back at those moments makes me sad because I started to seek validation from other people through the number of likes I received in social media. It became apparent to me that their opinion dictated how I should act in the virtual world. It came down to what they think of me rather than what I think about myself. I was so engrossed about the response I should get from people I don’t even know in social media but I think nobody really cared about what I posted as much as I did. Hahaha I am just glad that I am past that stage and have come to love myself through my own eyes and not from the lens of others. 

The internet has brought a lot of positive changes in today’s world. Communication is a lot easier and more relationships are being built through different social media platforms. However, if used the wrong way, it can bring a myriad of psychological and self esteem issues. I have come to realise that social media is a powerful tool in developing both positive and negative feelings towards ourselves and others. It is important to remember that the online world is very much different from the real world. While it is certainly true that it makes us cool and popular, it does not tell the whole story and should not define us as normal people and our relationships. Imagine if we put the same effort to our interactions with real people the way we pressure ourselves to create an image online, the world would be very different. 

As I look back to that one faithful night, I want to tell those girls that they are beautiful and looking for positive response in social media is a scary thing. While it makes you feel good for a moment, it can be toxic in the long run. This could lead you to believe that the opinion of others are facts. And when they start to ignore your posts, you might end up questioning yourself. So, be happy in the moment. Live your life the way you want it and not what you want people to see. Remember, you are beautiful and your heart is pure - that’s what ultimately matters. 







Jacket > Thrifted (Php100)
Pants > Thrifted (Php35)
Sneakers > Thrifted (Php500)
Eyewear > Sunnies Studio

Photography by Rodjie Mediana Ortega
Locale : Cebu City 


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