24 August 2016

Lambug Beach, Badian Cebu
"At first I asked myself, why would I even go back to a place where I had so much memories with a past love? Will I be able to enjoy the sun rising with the same hope of spending eternity with him? To collect pebbles and seashells we once enjoyed together? To slam my body against ravaging waves while holding his hand? To look at the sunset with so much love in my heart? To be strong enough to look at the same stars we once promised to each other? Will I be able to handle these all by myself? The truth was, I had doubts. But I knew I had to do it and face my fears. Or else I'll stay stuck in my bubble full of anxiety and questions." - Philip Pingoy

We have that one place that we always go to when we're happy, sad, and even when we're confused. When I had the chance to go solo backpacking, I decided to go to Badian. So I packed my bag, went to the bus terminal and took a ride going to the South of Cebu. Badian has always been one of my favorite towns. I love its white sand beaches and its lush mountains. And the sunset is truly breathtaking. 

It was actually a struggle. It rained very hard that day that I almost wanted to go back home. But again, I knew I had to do it. While looking at the countryside, I realized that it's not always about the destination, but it's about the journey of finding yourself again. 

When I arrived in Badian, I went to the public market and bought some food for myself. Then I rode a tricycle going to Lambug Beach. It was still raining hard. I felt heaven was crying for me too. To my surprise, when I arrived there, the sea was so calm and peaceful. It was everything I needed it to be. I rented a room and settled in. There was no turning back anymore. I remembered everything we used to do there. Flashback after flashback. I remembered setting our cameras to have our photos taken. I remembered his colorful beach ball. The white shirt he was wearing. The way we held hands and laughed at silly things we did. I listened to his stories about his ex. I tried to cheer him up despite his heartbreak. I wanted to tell him, I am just here for you. After all, I am just a friend. 

 It was in Badian that I truly fell in love with this person and it was at the same beach that I  picked up the broken pieces of my heart.

(to be continued)

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